A Bit of My Blogging Journey

After a failed self-hosted website attempt, I had a month off blogging and took a break from writing in public.

I wasn’t sure if I would blog again and I was almost ready to give up on writing. I needed to take some time to write for my eyes only. I needed to get away from the pressure of writing for an audience. I didn’t want my audience to change me, to change how I wrote.

And so I wrote for me. And I remembered why I wrote.

I can’t not write. There are things in me that just need to come out. They come out in writing.

When I write in my journal, I like what I write. I like how I sound. Because it’s me. It’s real. I want to write like that no matter who is reading my words.

So I started this blog because I just want to be me. I want the real me to be seen.

I read Allison Fallon’s book about writing and it helped me understand why my previous blogging attempts failed.

I didn’t know who I was. And when I don’t know who I am, I don’t know what I want to say. So no matter how big my audience, it means nothing. I get moulded into what I think my audience wants because I lack a sense of self and only give them what I think they want to hear.

But the real valuable stuff comes when I am me and I say what I want to say. The valuable stuff is also the vulnerable stuff, though, because it’s scary to be me and say what I want to say. But, as I said in my very first post about why I created this blog, I want to go there.

So what I mostly do with this blog is take my journal entries (or the ideas from them) and post them. There is a little editing to add context and to make them coherent and comprehendible. Some posts I polish more than others, but essentially, this blog is the raw stuff from my journal pages. The truest version of me.

I’ve learnt I need to write for my eyes only first. As soon as I write for my audience first, I can feel something isn’t right. Often this means drafting my blog post in a Word document and not in the WordPress new post box. Getting away from the blog platform helps me remember I’m writing for me first.

As long as I write for me first, I will be me and say what I want to say. And I will be okay with whatever I write because it’s me. I am okay with this blog because it’s me.

What’s your blogging journey?

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8 thoughts on “A Bit of My Blogging Journey

  1. I started my blog definitely as a writing blog to share my writing journey. I started it because I had read a blog where a writer shared their rejection letters and I remember thinking how brave that was so I began doing that as well on my blog. After I stopped submitting as much, I morphed the blog into sharing writing struggles, writing advice and things of general interest in writing. Sometimes I also share painful things that get in the way of my writing. With writing you do have to be vulnerable to be real.

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    1. That’s cool! I do like writing blogs and tried having one. It was one of my more fun blogs but I found there were other things I wanted to write about. Mainly my journey and what I learn. So that blog was valuable to help me know this about myself, I guess.
      I love the idea of sharing rejection letters. I’m trying to remember to keep all mine instead of deleting them or throwing them out. Inspired by Stephen King – hehe.

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  2. I have struggled with the same things too. This post is a reminder first and foremost to be honest and write like no one is reading. This is one of the ways you can inspire others to become the best version of themselves. It’s good to know that others writer struggle with similar things.

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